How to survive Long Distance Relationship (LDR)

Distance is temporary ; but Love is permanent

Easy to say; hard to do. That’s right! I feel you.

I’m in a long distance relationship with my special someone for 3 years now. He’s a sailor with a 9 months contract and I’m a local based pharmacist running my own business in our hometown. We get to see each other after he finishes his contract for only like two months before he sails away again for another nine months. We have that kind of set up for 3 years but still I’m not getting used to it. All that airport scenes, crying episodes and saying your goodbyes are still new to me every time he leaves. But that’s life. You just have to trust the process. For the mean time, let me share with you our secret for our three year old LDR love story. 

couple having a good time in dessert museum
THE DESSERT MUSEUM
MANILA
02-02-19

1. COMMUNICATION

lovers having videocall
Vietnam = Philippines

Just like any other relationships, communication is the number one ingredient to a successful partnership. K and I value communication the most. This is where the positive effects of social media comes in. Facebook , Instagram, Twitter, email and the likes. Our only problem is whenever he’s on navigation and there’s no signal at all.

But this is what I like about our LDR. Sometimes, signal sucks so we have to deal with the absence of each other. No chat, no video calls or even email for days and sometimes it takes a month before he could update me again. These circumstances however give us the chance to live life outside of our relationship, and have reasons to miss each other again if I make sense.

2. UNDERSTANDING

lovers on candy see saw at dessert museum manila

Being a sailor is as busy as being a pharmacist. That is what we are. Not to mention the time differences and work schedules that sometimes don’t match.

Understand your partner (especially you HE kingdom!).

Know that sometimes you can’t talk for hours because he’s too tired from work. Understand that there are days when she misses you so much that she just wanted to pick up some fight without valid reason in the middle of your conversation. Understand that sometimes you both will get tired. Not with each other, but with your situation. And that’s totally normal.But breakup is not an option. Cool down, talk it over and carry on.

3. PATIENCE

LOVERS IN TAGAYTAY
Having some couple photo ops before his sister tie the knot #KATHadhananiGIOV 

This is the most challenging part for me. I consider my self as the most impatient person ever existed until he came. This relationship taught me to wait and wait for the right time. All along I thought I was being impatient. Little did I know, I was already waiting for 9 years praying, hurting and wishing he would come. And he came. And all of the waiting made sense. It was all worth it. Can you feel how in love I am right now? 🙂

Patience in the relationship makes it run smoothly. It’s for every immature and sometimes irrational mind; Patience for the distance that separates you and patience for the time that you’re apart. There’s always a right time for everything. Right time to talk after a big fight; Right time for jokes and right moment for serious talks.

Maybe right time to settle down? That’s for the next chapter 🙂

4. EFFORT

gift ideas for LDR
9 Letters that I need to read for 9 months (every 22nd) that he’s away

This is my favorite one. Effort is like that cherry on top of your every favorite dessert. It makes you feel important, valued and young.

Kei is so into efforts and surprises. He never fail to surprise me every important event in our life. Every birthday, valentine’s day or even just an ordinary day. He’s full of surprises.

boyfriend surprises
He brought me my favorite foods. I cry. T.T

There’s this one time when I was on my way home from work. I was so excited to sleep because he’ll be home the next day. When I open the door of the apartment, he’s there. Holding a box of pizza with a note. He went home a day earlier to surprise me. One time, he went with me to watch G-Dragon MOTTE concert. He’s not into Kpop but he supported me all the way. Do what I do, learn to love what I love. And vice versa.

COUPLE ATTENDING G-DRAGON MOTTE IN MANILA CONCERT
G-DRAGON – MOTTE IN MANILA
ARANETA COLISEUM
SEPT 1,2017

5. LOVE

couple pic on their 2nd year anniversary
12-22-18
HAPPY 2nd YOY Year

They say, love isn’t enough for a relationship to survive. The handsome man beside me is making me feel that IT IS ENOUGH.. At the end of the day, it all boils down to LOVE. Love wins. It overpowers hatred, pride, record of wrongs, selfishness, even hunger (you know your chicken skin you give to your partner even though you’re dying inside because again, IT’S CHICKEN SKIN!!) and all the things that you can imagine that could possibly ruin the relationship. Love triggers your soul to think about your partner before yourself. To give extra effort for him/her. Love teaches you to understand and to forgive. To love harder every single day.. He made it possible. He did it all. I’m blessed because he came into my life.. I’m forever grateful.

And here we are, going three years 🙂

Leave a Reply